Friday, July 27, 2012

A picture from the past~

This post is part of the contest A picture can say a thousand words.. on WriteUpCafe.com
Short Story based on this picture.

The picture was clear to me. Stark, black and white but clear. There was me in it: a happier, much younger version of me. I wore a turban on my head along with my work clothes and carried Chanda: my daughter, on my shoulders like I use to, a long time back.

      She was four years old, as old as I last saw her. She sat comfortably with both her legs hanging around my neck and my head held in her baby arms. There was something in the way she rested her head on mine that made her seem weary yet confident. Like she knew, her Abbu would get her home somehow, anyhow.
    She wore her best dress, the pant suit that I bought for her for Eid. The dress was tad expensive by our standards. However, festivals had always made me splurge.
      Bit by bit, the picture grew a life and turned into a scene/ a sequence. On difficult nights, this was a dream that I lived. A dream, that never lasted for long, just about enough to bring me the taste of my past, of what I lost.  
      Crumpled was my life. Folded and creased endlessly. I was broke and homeless, without a friend or a foe.  No one cared, none bothered. Oh, I received a lot of those pitiful glances, those careless looks. Each set of eyes worried to rest on me. I was frightened of the freight in their eyes.   
      It was a dark silent night, one of the worst kinds, with no stars out. You had nothing to look up to, nothing to shine on you. And you wake up from a sweet dream to bitter cold.  Morning would bring rain..!
Tip!
Tip!
Tip!
    Incessant rain drops would pour down, soaking you, crowding you, drowning you.  I shuddered and tried to move to a comfortable sitting position, unsuccessfully. I was not alone. Under a lamp post, on a deserted by lane, I had street dogs for company. And a few other castaways like me. Some of them had not moved for days. And then there were others, who blabbered late into the night.
    I hated the street and I hated everyone around it, including myself. I wanted to run away. But, where would I go? I was a man, old before my time. I was dead alive. My past murdered my present and my future died in quick reaction.
    Everywhere that I went, memories reached me. Memories shuffled me like a pack of cards. It connected me to a past, I would much rather live and not dream about. A time, when I had a tiny but cozy home, a small but fertile farm land and most importantly, a wife and a four year old daughter: Chanda.
    My recurring dream was my sole solace, where I was a hero. In my delusions, I carried Chanda to safety, where she would be alive. I protected Chanda like a father should have, like I never could.
    The incessant rain and that furious flood took everything away from me. It left me guilty. Guilty of guilt that I was safe, I was alive when my wife and daughter were not. I was not there with them in death. I was away on my weekend trip to the city. Three hundred miles away-I was tucked in a warm blanket-when flood hit my village-wiping clear my life. It left me bereft of home, family and essence.
Tip!
Tip!
Tip!
It started to rain again, fading the picture of my past from my mind.  'Chanda, my dear daughter, wait for me, wait for your Abbu. Abbu’s coming for you…'. I was blabbering ~
  
If you liked my post, you can vote for it here~

74 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Suresh,

      Thank you for your first comment.
      I am happy to liked it :)

      Delete
  2. I want to give you something Ghazala... :)

    you can see it here
    http://canvascribbles.blogspot.in/2012/07/my-first-blog-award-leibster-award.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Dear Neha,

      Thank you so much...! I am delighted to receive this from a sweet person as you :)

      Delete
  3. Beautiful narration of a poignant tale! Well done!

    ReplyDelete
  4. well written..a very poignant tale..
    all d bst for the contest :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Saikat,

      Thank you, so happy to have your support :)

      Delete
  5. Very well written Ghazala. Very poignant!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Jaish,

      Always happy to see you here. Thanks :))

      Delete
  6. Replies
    1. Dear Vaishali,

      You are the last time winner. Saw your picture On Writeupcafe.
      You are famous girl..! Thanks :)

      Delete
  7. Replies
    1. Dear Nisha,

      Thank you so very much. Now that we met, let us keep in touch :)
      PS: I am inspired by you. Hugs~

      Delete
  8. well crafted styled and sculpted as art form..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Firoz ji,


      I am deeply touched by your feedback.
      You are generous and kind. Thanks~

      Delete
  9. great ! I loved your narration ... good luck for the contest

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. TTT,

      Hey you..! I look forward to seeing you here :)
      Thanks and take care~

      Delete
  10. Replies
    1. Dear Anu,

      You bring so much color with you. Love it:))
      Thanks and Amen ~

      Delete
  11. Replies
    1. Vikram Sir,


      Thank you, your face is as familiar as a friend's.
      Keep coming here :)

      Delete
  12. Lovely post. Touching and very poignant. Well done :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hari,

      Thanks man, your words mean a lot:)

      Delete
  13. ..absolutely wonderful! Superb narration:) Poignant and well crafted, Ghazala:) All the best!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Amit A,

      Thank you so very much. I am humbled :)

      Delete
  14. Very touchy Ghazala..liked it very much..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Ranita,


      I am glad that you liked it. Thanks :)

      Delete
  15. On this picture I have read so many different storiues , proves to say a picture can tell so many stories


    Bikram's

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Bikram,

      Yes, a picture can say thousand stories:)

      PS: Hope you liked mine ~

      Delete
  16. Interesting, breathless language compliments the poignant story. Excellent work, Ghazala. Wish you the best in whatever contest it is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UmaS,

      Thanks, pleased to get your feedback.
      Thank you so very much :)

      Delete
  17. I have gone through a;; your blogs.
    one on fashion show and the other
    poems and the restaurant..
    photography is superb.
    As to your style of writing it is very
    unique and direct.
    nice to connect.
    pl send me info when you post a blog..
    I would love to be in touch with you.
    I liked the picture story
    Beena sends her regards.
    love

    Sampath

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Sampathji,

      I will never forget my visit to your beautiful home. And after Sulekha we can connect here. To keep abreast my blogs, you can subscribe by leaving your email(there is a button for it on my page) and join the site as a follower of my blogs. I will do the same for yours.

      Regards to both of you :)

      Delete
  18. Very well written Ghazala. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Sridhar,

      Thank you for connecting on Writeup cafe as well :)

      Delete
  19. Very very touching piece, ghaz...the story beautifully blends the chills of reality. All the best.
    And...
    There’s a surprise waiting for you. Please check the link.
    http://panchalibolchi.blogspot.in/2012/07/a-gift.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Panchalidi,

      I already checked it out. I am so happy that I got it from you..!
      It means a lot. Thank you and always look forward to seeing you here~

      Delete
  20. Nice work ! All the best for the contest !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Mysay,

      Thank you so much. Good to see you here.
      I always enjoy interacting with co bloggers.
      That is the only way for growth :)
      PS: I tried leaving a comment on your space but just could not:(

      Delete
  21. Ah, the beauty and the sadness. Very good.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello Sandeep,


      Thanks, glad it touched you :)

      Delete
  22. Nice post and good luck for the contest. :)
    I've tagged you to a Liebster and an awesome blogger award :). Check this link : http://nehasjournal.blogspot.in/2012/07/two-in-one.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Neha,

      Thank you so much, just saw your page..! I am so happy and excited
      for awesome bloggers award and Liebster award too :)

      Delete
  23. Replies
    1. Dear Rachna,


      Happy to see you here,
      keep dropping in. Thanks :)

      Delete
  24. Lovely narration and excellent/unique style of story telling. Very apt choice of words in the tale. Keep writing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hello RJT,

      Thank you for enjoying my story :)

      Delete
  25. Tip Tip Tip at the end just poured my heart in drops of rain :)
    beautifully scribbled...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Jasmeet,

      I could not place you, you look so different..!
      Very chick I must say.
      And thanks for that lovely feedback~

      Delete
  26. beautifully written.must say a poignant tale.
    Best of luck for the contest
    -Gunjan Sinha

    ReplyDelete
  27. Every story I have read on this picture is wonderful. This one is no exception. All the best, Ghazala :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Cyb,

      Thanks, nice of you to say that.
      Keep coming this way~

      Delete
  28. Replies
    1. Welcome to my space Rahul and thanks for the encouragement :)

      Delete
  29. Very heartfelt and touching, Ghazala! Well done :) my best wishes for you with the contest :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Arti,


      The picture just pulled my heart strings so wrote this down.
      Glad you like it. thanks :)

      Delete
  30. Replies
    1. SS,

      Thanks for letting me know you liked it :)

      Delete
  31. There was a deep sense of pain in your writing which gripped my heart. Excellent narrative that moved my heart. An emotionally potent read. Beautifully written. :) And all the best for the competition.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Raj,


      Thank you so much..! Yes, I wrote this with lucid emotions.
      There is something about this picture that made me realise
      it is a happy picture but has a gloom around it :)

      Delete
  32. I won't say anything different that what everyone has written but still a very poignant and emotional post. :) Very well written.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welcome to my world Goingbeyond,

      Thanks for leaving your foot prints.
      Yes, this one resonates with poignancy :)

      Will check your space asap ~

      Delete
  33. Evocative, poignant - loved it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Purba,

      Thanks for reading this,
      As soon as I saw this picture
      on Writeup cafe, some thing stirred in me :)

      Delete
  34. Nicely penned, Ghazala. I've read many posts on this topic, and yours is very beautiful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dear Rachna,

      Coming from you, I take it as a compliment.
      Thanks, I appreciate the gesture :)

      Delete
  35. A marvellous classic having poignant nodes aromatised with emotions, full of deep pains which depict the harsh realities of life fully capable of sending shivers to even an iron and emotionless person. A great writing coupled with sensous feelings. A brilliant attempt paving the way for the making of a great writer. Words are a few ones to compliment you Ghazie. Hats off to you. Well done

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Sid,

      Every writer dreams of a reader like you,
      someone who understands sensibilities
      along with sensitivities of the write up..!

      Thanks always~

      Delete
  36. I would like to compliment this blog with the following lines:
    सितम हवा का अगर तेरे तन को रास नहीं
    कहां से लाऊं वो झोंका जो मेरे पास नहीं
    उम्र जलवों में बसर हो ये जरूरी तो नहीं
    हर शब-ए-गम की सहर हो ये जरूरी तो नहीं
    आग है, पानी है, मिट्टी है, हवा है मुझ में
    और फिर मानना पड़ता है कि खुदा है मुझ में
    कल गए थे तुम जिसे बीमार-ए-हिजरां छोड़कर
    चल बसा वो आज सब हस्ती का सामां छोड़कर
    A true blog which I have come across after decades. Totally realistic

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow Sid,

      Such deep meaningful lines,
      you have a poet's heart and soul.
      Thanks and keep visiting my page:)

      Delete